breathe

the year is almost over and i can't seem to shake off the bad feeling. 2008 was not a good year for me and up to the last few days of the year, everything just don't seem right. i don't want to carry all the blues to the coming year as i am hopeful that the new year will bring in a better and happier year. i hate it when i am like this, not in my usual-happy-self. but still, there's this litttle voice in my head, constantly reminding me that "life is what you make it". it's true, it all depends on me whether i want to be happy regardless of what bothers me or just sulk and stay in the gloomy side of life. but there's this part of me that wants to linger and just wallow. confused, all i can do is breathe.

euan's 2nd birthday

this is a super late post of euan's birthday. it was just a simple celebration with family and friends. i cooked pasta with creamy pesto sauce and chicken & pesto quesadillas (which was a hit!! the recipe can be found here)
since euan's birthday falls on nov 1, we wanted his birthday to be a little special even without throwing a big party for him. and so for the first time we went trick or treat at festival super mall (oct 31), with euan as Tigger. he was so cute in the orange costume! (yun nga lang he was always mistaken as winnie the pooh!?! i heard one of the sales lady saying, "Ang cute naman ni pooh!" sabay abot ng candies kay euan! hay!)
although their theme was something about the Wild, Wild West, i did not bother anymore to get a costume for that theme since i bought the costume before i knew what the theme was. inititally i wanted a bumble bee costume which i think would be cute on him. i thought that i won't be able to fine one in divisoria so i just settled for the tigger costume. but when i went to 168, i found a very cute bumble bee costume and the same tigger costume, cheaper pa than the one i bought! sayang! they also have mickey mouse, barney, sponge bob, pooh, piglet, superman, spiderman, etc...

anyway, euan enjoyed the trick or treat activity even if he fell asleep for an hour (so i was the who went trick or treat for him which i also enjoyed heheh even if i had to carry him while going around the mall) and so when he woke up he was just too happy to see that his jack o' lantern loot bag was full of goodies! i never gave him candies so when he saw it, he wanted to open all the candies at the same time. but he settled with the lollipop instead and just played with the rest of candies.


next year kaya, ano naman ang gimmick ni euan? hay, the stagemom in me....

cooking adventures

i am not a good cook but i love to eat. but ever since i got married, i took it upon myself to learn how to cook. i try as much as i can to cook and serve good food to my family. i read food blogs and watch cook shows a lot so as to expand my knowledge and to overcome my fear in cooking hehehe.
and so whenever i cook i always have a "kodigo" with me, be it a recipe book, a downloaded recipe, or just a scribbled note. sayang nga i wansn't able to take note of the recipes of my late lola, who used to cook for us. i could have passed on her legacy of great dishes to my kids pero i was just to lazy to cook when i was still single. i think si kuya ata ang nakamana ng galing sa pagluluto ni lola! :)
some of her dishes that i really love are: kare-kare, rellenong bangus, ginisang pusit, mechado, pickles (parang afritadang manok but tastes sweeter). i remember i used to ask her how to cook those dishes and she would readily enumerate the procedures and she knows it by heart!
and so based from what i remember, i tried cooking kare-kare, ginisang pusit and mechado, but mine does not come close to her version (either mine is maalat or matabang, soupy or malapot, basta extremes!)
but practice makes perfect. i hope someday i could do justice to her well-loved dishes :)
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my most frequently visited (or should i say fave) sites: pinoycook, my great food, and nestle. sometimes i do visit quickfire and ajinomoto (for ka-touque's recipes) sites.

bluer than blue

it breaks my heart to know that euan kept looking for me the whole time yesterday...he didn't saw me leave yesterday, but today he was awake and we played a little before i left for work.
it's just so sad not to be with him and to take care of him because he has colds and i'm afraid it might lead to asthma again. although he is still the same active, always-playing-never-gets-tired boy, i just hope he'll recover soon.
i just can't stop thinking of euan but someone told me that the more i think about him, the more he'll get anxious. i really do hope to get over all my blues in a breeze.

anxious

i am back to work and i can't help but feel anxious. i miss euan terribly... i think i am having a second bout of separation anxiety. i just hope he would be ok even without me taking care of him...or i think it's more of the other way around - i hope that i will be able to get used to this and adjust quickly with this set up. :(

busy as a bee

i'm quite busy. i am doing mama au's invitation for her 60th birthday next year. i'll post some pictures as soon as i am done doing it.

another altered art

these are wooden chopping board, made as key holders. i made these as gifts for our godmothers.

i miss scrapping!

these are the latest scrap i made as gifts for my friends. i made these last july. these plus a couple of altered chopping boards (which i will post soon) are the only scrap that i made this year :( since i'm on leave, i am planning to finish so many albums that were put on hold...i am also planning to start doing my christmas gifts for family and friends, the scrappy anna way. i'm so bad in meeting deadlines but i do hope to finish, even just the gifts. that's quite a lot and being the moody scrapper that i am, i'm crossing my fingers, sana matapos ko lahat! goodluck na lang sa akin ;)

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i wonder why there are 2 versions of the slide? hmmm.... baka may mali akong napindot!

"i-nan"

that's how euan says his name. cute noh?! this month he started saying his name, associating things to him, like if he sees his diapers, he would say, "mama, 'i-nan'?" or if he sees his clothes, he would say "i-nan?!" he is so cute! and smart! and if there's one thing that i also find funny (and wierd) is his fondness for his blanket. when he turned one, he would always look for his "nu-not" (kumot)! and so whenever he drinks his milk or gets sleepy, he would always say, "mama, nu-not!"
euan is growing up fast right before my eyes. it makes me happy to see him learning new words, doing things on his own, like getting his slippers or shoes, throwing things in the trash can (like my hair clips, buti na lang hindi cell phone!)
and he knows how to get mad too! saying things that we don't understand but you know it from the tone of his voice and the look of his eyes that he is angry. i don't know how i will be able to correct it but as much as possible we don't raise our voices and whenever he show his angry mood, we would always try to pacify him. i hope we are doing the right thing. and i hope that this is just a phase that would pass by...
hay, it's really hard to raise up a toddler! tiring! but at the end of the day, nothing beats a kiss, a hug, a "voo-voo" (i love u!), and the mere mention of "mama" from euan. that in the world is the sweetest thing, enough to blow all those tiredness away. :)

i'm a SAHM!

due to thickened endometrial stripe, i recently underwent a fractional D&C as recommended by my OB. so now i am on maternity leave which makes me a stay-at-home-mom! though i have limitations with my usual activities due to the minor procedure, i get to enjoy being with euan for 2 months the most, yey!

new hobby

Richie and I are starting out with this new hobby. Recently we bought a Nikon D40 DSLR (after much of my prodding, really). Actually it is really my goal to capture great photos of my family since I’m into scrap booking. That’s why I wanted so badly to have a good camera. What I didn’t realize is that photography is equally a demanding hobby as scrap booking! Both needs much of your time and devotion to learn the ropes before you can be satisfied with the results of your efforts. So in order to nurture my yet-to-be-discovered talent in photography, I have started my quest by reading photography books and articles. So far, here’s what I learned:

1. Know your gear. Read the manual of your camera. Unless you do, you won’t be able to maximize the great potentials of your gear. Your camera should be your best bud so you have to be familiar with all its settings, modes, etc, before you can take that perfect shot. I have read my manual a couple of times and that perfect shot is still elusive. I am not yet satisfied with my photos although I am happy to be able to manipulate my gear in bringing out how I wanted my subject to be. Which leads me to point # 2.

2. Compose your subject. Photos are like stories, it tells you something. And in almost all cases, the story depends on the person behind the lens. As they say, “It’s in the Indian, not the pana.” No matter how great or advanced your camera is, if you don’t know how to use it and don’t have an eye for detail, it won’t work. I have a tendency to be “shutter-happy” at times that’s why most of my photos are not clutter-free. I always remind myself a dozen times over that just like in writing, I always have to compose my pictures before pressing that shutter. More often I just press that shutter unmindful of the background or the condition just to capture my son’s moments. Sadly most of the photos are not so good or sometimes, there's this perfect moment for a great photograph and by the time I got the camera, the moment's gone. Maybe i just have to wait for Euan to get a little older so it would be easy for him to pose for the camera.

3. Rule of thirds. This is also related to point #2 and is a great help in composing your subject. It's like putting your subject in an imaginary matrix. It somewhat leads the eye to your subject thus creating a strong focal point of your photo.

So far, those are the things that i remembered and I still have a lot of learning to do. I have tons of reading materials and still have to practice (and experiment) on most of my shots. But one of the things that i like about this hobby is that it makes me appreciate the things around me. Now I am always on the lookout for that beautiful sunset, the greenest grasses, the flowers in bloom, or even the ants at work! kahit nga barbed wire pwede! basta anything that catches my attention :) Hirap pala maging photographer... It really takes great skill and sensitivity to be one, and I wanted to give it a shot!

for more sample photos click here.

a fresh start

i decided to create a new blog...have been so delinquent in creating posts lately...and after all that has happened in my life, i feel that i just need a fresh start... to write my fleeting thoughts, to share the simple things that I delight in - straight from the heart.